Corey Boutwell Podcast

How To Generate Your Own Motivation FAST #238

coreyboutwell.com Season 1 Episode 238

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If you’re new to my page my name’s Corey Boutwell. I’m the founder and CEO of men’s personal development company Set The Standard. I’m a professional bodybuilder, I have coached over 300 men to their full potential and created a multi six figure business in just 3 years. This podcast is where I share EVERYTHING I learn along the way.

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Speaker 1:

When I'm stressed out and procrastinating, I run through this exercise and it helps me get more motivated to have the conversations I'm avoiding and make room to create. Welcome back to another Corey Batwell podcast, guys, and I cannot wait to get into this one. This one is all about how to increase your motivation, and we know what this is like because I have this theory for me, where I like the theory when people talk about when motivation finishes, you got to rely on discipline. So discipline is more important than motivation, but discipline, I believe, only lasts so long like you can be disciplined. Some people their tolerance could be a year and it's every single day doing the same old things like waking up and crushing it. Some people it's five, 10 years, 20 years, and if they don't have any soul encouraging motivation, the discipline also drops off. So I believe you need a healthy dose of both, and one of the best things about discipline is that if you have the discipline to get motivated and know that oh, I'm not motivated currently, but I want to get this back it's going to help you get to the next level. So I don't know about you, but have you guys ever been in a position where it's like I know I've got these tasks to do and I know that if I just did this or I just smack that or whatever it is, I'd get to the next level.

Speaker 1:

But for some reason, you just don't do them. And it's really frustrating and you're you're like, ah, why am I not doing this? And I was like, well, if I just did these tasks and I'd be able to add another zero in my bank account, I'd be able to get the partner that I want or get over the relationship conflict drama that we're having right now. I'd be able to close the deal, I'd be able to create way more content and I'd get so much time back if I just did these tasks. But but for some reason I'm not doing them Right? How frustrating is it when that happens, right? And who doesn't want to get over that? Like, definitely me.

Speaker 1:

And what's so interesting is studies show that 72% of entrepreneurs have mental health issues, which means they are way more stressed than the norm. Stress impacts motivation, so and studies show this studies legitimately show that people who have high levels of stress have way more depression. They have way more anxiety and xyz and their motivation drops. Right. And it's interesting that you've got these high performing entrepreneurs, you have the most amount of stress, but they're also remaining really motivated and they're getting tasks done. It's like, why is that? Well, they go for a lot of periods of not being motivated. They go for a lot of periods of like no, I'm not going to do this task, but I just can't do them. But what's the difference is they increase their own emotional intelligence, they invest in themselves, or they they do something, some some sort of internal work which helps them, like, really level up, and that sometimes comes in the form of.

Speaker 1:

You know, some people watch motivational videos. It comes from books, it comes from mentors, it comes from courses or programs, but somewhere along the line they're like I need to get re-motivated again. Let's go and they get connected to the motivation. They get to the next level, or they're extremely clear on their vision, or they do what I'm going to teach you guys in here, and you guys can do this anytime you like. Like this is a technique that I think is so brilliant and it's stolen from Jordan Peterson. Like, I use this from Jordan Peterson. He does it over like a, let's say, to do his program for this. It's like six months to write Like. It takes a really long time. You can do this one in like 20 minutes 10 to 20 minutes, which is really cool.

Speaker 1:

So the first question I like to ask here is like where does stress come from? Well, most of stress is simply perceived Like unless we're experiencing physical, tangible things happening to us, like working out or injuring ourselves or eating a really big meal, that causes stress but most of that stress is just perceived as like what we think is coming from, some sort of stress activates the fear parts of our brain and the next minute we're like freaking out. Oh, I got all this stress and I have, like I have a lot of perceived stress myself, especially around wanting to get to the next level in business and deliver an amazing result for my clients. So whenever I assume or predict that something's going to go wrong, I legit throw an internal tantrum like I go crazy on the inside. Like I go like freak it out. I'm like Whoa, I've got to be doing this and this. And I project it on my loved ones. I get angry and frustrated at people. I get really controlling and I try to control everything because I have this fear inside my chest that says don't fail.

Speaker 1:

I had an experience I think it was last year with my team and I just said to all of them like right now I'm legitimately throwing a tantrum, like my body and my internal state is like throwing a tantrum right now. I can't control this. I need your guys support for xyz, because it's like I'm so triggered and it was all just around. You know the amount of finances that were coming into the business and that was like freaking me out. I'm so happy that it happened, because now I know exactly what it takes to manage finances properly and have an increased capacity. That's like when I see something, I don't get triggered and I start thinking rationally and logically but how to get to the next level, and I'm still motivated the whole time to do it. So that's the assumption that I'm having. But also, at the same time, I'm still extremely productive and I'm crushing it in most areas. It's like, well, I'm crushing it in all these areas. So how? Why am I freaking out with this one little thing?

Speaker 1:

So yeah, I'm going to teach you exactly how to do this, but the exercise is called a quick trip to heaven and a quick trip to hell, and we do this in the no my set, the standard men's personal growth community, but we do it on like a larger scale. This is an even smaller scale that you can use. You know immediately which I think is so brilliant, but essentially what it does is it helps you identify what you want to run towards and why you want to run towards that, and then it helps you identify what you want to run away from and why, which means you have two directions of motivation going for the same, going into the same way, like the, the going in the same direction towards the same goal. I know, even being to tony robbins, you know, unleashed the potential within that. He does like a. He did a meditation that was quite similar and I loved it and it got you to like, fight back for like why you don't want to stay where you are now, which I think is really cool because, at the end of the day, all you want to do is consistently grow right.

Speaker 1:

So when I'm stressed out and procrastinating, I run through this exercise and helps me get more motivated to have the conversations I'm avoiding and make room to create, because I believe most of the time as entrepreneurs, or if you want to be high performing, like in your business, or you want to be taking things to the next level. You want to get fit, you want to get healthy, you want to have a great relationship. You have to be creating, you have to get beyond yourself and you have to have room to do that. And we forget about making room because we, what we do, is we start making everything about ourselves or we start attaching our worth into other areas, like no, this is important, this is important.

Speaker 1:

I can't tell this person this, I can't tell that person that bit of people, people pleasing and a lack of boundary setting, and because of that, we forget the room that we have and we start trying to do everything all at once and then we're like I've run out of room, like I've run out of room and that next minute I can't do this task and I can't take action. I've got like 10 different things to do in my calendar in the next. Like you know, five to seven hours, like five hours, like 10 different things I've got to crush today. And why can I not do them? And it's like, well, your whole body and your mind hasn't got the space to be able to do, to be able to do it, because you haven't got the motivation to do so. So what happens is when I run through this, I start taking massive actions like every single time, and it's such a good skill to cultivate.

Speaker 1:

So if you have this on the email address or you want me to send this to you it might be even in description below you can use it, copy and paste it, put it into chat, gpt and just say ask me one question at a time in this, because I want to do the worksheet myself, or you can just meditate on it, but I highly recommend actually writing it down. So when you have gone through this, now you've got this skill and this technique you'll be able to use all the time. So listen to this because it's really cool. So the first thing is you just break down your life into essentially like when you were a childhood, in your mid-teens, in your late teens, in your 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, so you kind of break it up into 10 years, 10 or 5 years it's however much effort you want to put into it and you just say ask yourself the question it's like what happened in my 30s let's say 30s, because I'm in my 30s that has affected you negatively. You write it down and you say why? So the thing that has affected you negatively most in your 30s, in your 20s, what is the thing that has most affected you negatively and why? Write it down.

Speaker 1:

Same thing with your late teens, you do it with your mid-teens, and then you do it in your childhood and you look at those areas and you figure out what is the common pattern and you try to answer it in one sentence, like what's the pattern between these? Some may not be similar, but you might have two or three or something like that that like align. You're like, wow, they're really similar. So write down that recurring theme and that pattern and then you project that, project that into the future. Right, this is called quick trip to hell. So we're going to hell here. So what you ask is all right.

Speaker 1:

So if I keep this pattern, or I keep this native theme that I've had since my childhood, until my thirties, forties, however old you are and then you ask okay, in five years from now, if I keep this, what does my life look like? And how do I feel about it In 10 years from now? What does my life look like? How do I feel about it In 20 years from now? What does my life look like? How do I feel about it In 30 years from now? What does my life look like? How do I feel about it In 40 years from now? What does my life look like and how do I feel about it? So you have to paint that picture out and you're not allowed to say dead, you're not allowed to say death in there at all. You have to face the pain of writing out what it looks like if you keep the current patterns that are holding you back through the next 10 to the next 5 to 40 years. And this, when you look at it, it's quite grim, right, you've got to face it. You look at it and you go, oh, yuck, like looking at that.

Speaker 1:

That is something that I don't want, because if we stay the same or we take steps backwards, prevents us from growing, and I believe, as humans, our most important task is to consistently grow, not just externally but internally, and our internal state is a reflection of what happens externally. Right, well, sorry, our external state, what happens around us, is a result of what is happening internally. So the more that we are growing in business, the more that we're growing in relationships, the more that we're growing in fitness is a reflection of how we feel about ourselves, our motivation and our discipline. So this is the negative motivation that helps you move towards your goal. That's like, oh shit, I got, I got to get out of here, like I've got to start doing something right. That will get you. That amount of pain will create more driving forces than restraining forces. That will help you have the conversation that'll help you move houses. That'll help you have the conversation that'll help you move houses. That'll help you end things in a toxic relationship. That'll help you ask for more money. That'll help you quit your job and start a business. That'll help you scale your business. It'll help you stop distracting and focusing on heaps of other shit and instead focusing on what's most important in your business. Right, just from doing this exercise.

Speaker 1:

And then the second part we go to heaven, baby. So this is the fun. You always want to go to heaven. Uh, hell first and then heaven after. Because if you go to heaven and you're like this is amazing, then you go to hell. You're left quite negative. So you always want to do the positive after.

Speaker 1:

And this is the question that you ask what does the best version of yourself do and prioritize? Now, that is different from the hell version of you. So what is is different now, like what do you do on the daily? And what you'll notice which is really cool is it's so small. It's the actions that you take and the tasks that you do are usually some internal state which is really tiny. It's like getting up a little bit earlier. It's like any time I have a value, that any time I need to have a difficult conversation, I just book it in and have it straight away. It's like I have those standards for myself and this helps you understand your standards. You understand your standards so you can set the standard, set a new standard and show up as the best version of you because of the work that you've done. And you ask these questions. So what does it look like that's differently? And then you go cool In five years from now, what does my life look like when I prioritize that In 10 years from now?

Speaker 1:

What does my life look like when I prioritize that In 10 years from now? What does my life look like when I prioritize that In 20 years from now? What does my life look like when I prioritize that In 30 years from now? What does my life look like when I prioritize that In 40 years from now. What does it look like when I prioritize that and what you start to notice is you're like, wow, if I keep these small tools and differences up, just from not focusing on the slight little differences, moving forward and committing to those, I am going to achieve everything that I've ever wanted. And it becomes really tangible, which gives you this bigger motivation. That's like wow, I have to do these things and I've got to do them now, which that is the key and the resource that helps you get out of procrastinating, going oh, I've got all these tasks that I need to do and I'm just not doing them. It's like, well, I have to now because I've just mapped this out. No-transcript.

Speaker 1:

When you're in this state, it's very. Joseph dispensary is in the position of well, I'm changing my emotional state and I'm being the best version of myself. So the only thing that's going to happen to me is, at times, time's the only thing that's going to catch up. So my external results and everything that I want around me. If I be this person, then the only difference between me getting everything that I want because I'm being that person is just time. Then I just have to consistently show up right. Sometimes it can, honestly, be that simple, so whenever I get stuck, or I'm failing, or I'm getting down to myself or myself, or I'm procrastinating I know there's a lot to do I come and revisit this, and it just helps me, like, break through that cycle and, boom, start crushing it.

Speaker 1:

So if you can't be bothered to learning to grow on your own, just letting you know I've got your back. That's why that's why you guys are listening and choosing tuning in and coming on here, so you're welcome, and one thing about this work, though, is it's confronting and it takes accountability, which is the thing that we prioritize in the Set, the Standard Men's Personal Growth Community. So if you're a man, come reach out. We'd love to have you in the community. But anyway, guys, thank you for tuning in. I hope you have the most amazing day. Please send this to someone or give us a follow so you don't miss out on these podcasts, because I hope that I'm giving you some absolute pure gold so that you can be the best version of yourself, and we'll see you in the next one. Have an amazing day.