CHEAT SHEET For Setting High Standards #237

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If you’re new to my page my name’s Corey Boutwell. I’m the founder and CEO of men’s personal development company Set The Standard. I’m a professional bodybuilder, I have coached over 300 men to their full potential and created a multi six figure business in just 3 years. This podcast is where I share EVERYTHING I learn along the way.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Setting Higher Standards for Success
• 6:48 Overcoming Mediocrity and Setting Standards
• 16:21 Raising Standards for Professional Growth

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

coach a bunch of millionaires on their standards and increasing their standards. My very first client was a multi-millionaire e-com guy and pretty much all of my one-on-one clients have been millionaire or millionaire status. Welcome back to the Corey Batwell podcast and today we are talking about how to set higher standards for yourself. This podcast is going to be absolutely set higher standards for yourself. This podcast is going to be absolutely epic. So essentially, what happens is if you don't have high enough standards, these things happen. You have missed career opportunities and growth. You have poor time management and performance. You have limited professional connections. You're known as unreliable. You have, you're failing behind in learning new skills. You have financial stress and insecurity. You have slow wealth accumulation. You have a lack of self-improvement. You realize that you're not growing as much as you'd like to and you have physical, mental health problems and you have conflicts and weakened relationships, which looks like a lack of intimacy or connection in relationships. So I used to think that my standards were high. I used to be like I have the highest standards ever and find out pretty quickly that they weren't and, out of pure arrogance, used to think that they were and it wasn't, until I've had a knock over the head, boulder over the head, knock over the head like a hundred times that I start to figure out. Well, maybe my stuff, my standards, could be raised and maybe it's a continual process to keep on raising my standards. And what I find is a lot of people's ego gets confused when they have really high standards and then they lose some standards and then they just expect themselves to get their real like their high standards back again. It's like no, you're gonna go back to the drawing board, follow a process, start at the bottom, start at the small things and start working your way up. It's a progress. It's sort of like imagine if you start reading a book and then you don't read or touch the book for like two years and you're only one quarter of the way in and then you go shit, where the hell was I in the book? And you got to look for it again. You're better off just starting at the start. It's the same thing for our standards, right? So I've essentially coached a bunch of millionaires on their standards and increasing their standards. My very first client was a multi-millionaire e-com guy and pretty much all of my one-on-one clients have been millionaire or millionaire status, which is awesome, and coaching them helped me to increase my own standards. So imagine coaching people who are better than you in so many areas in wealth and mindset and relationships and commitment and discipline and all these amazing areas but they trust you to be able to call them out on their blind spots and help them set high standards.

Speaker 1: 2:41

There's so many times I'll think who the fuck am I to be able to help these people increase their standards when they're achieving all these things that I want? I had to think about this right, because there's a lot of imposter syndrome that would come up. So I was like where did they actually respect me? Well, they respected my discipline and my consistency to maintain my standards over a long period of time and my rate of growth. There is no period of time where I have not been growing physically, mentally, in my heart and in leadership, and it is shown through, like the results that I've gotten through business and all the rest of it, and also just my own growth in regards to emotional intelligence and actual intelligence, which has been really cool, because before I was coaching like multi-millionaires and helping them crush it, I had to learn the skill. Firstly, I learned these skills and these were something that they respected because they were like man, I want that I wouldn't scroll. I don't scroll on my phone for hours. I've got strong boundaries around my phone and I've set my phone up so that I can have boundaries around that so I am not tempted to go and scroll. I don't get distracted by women, photos or porn online anymore.

Speaker 1: 3:47

When I used to be big time, I went seven months without ejaculation. So there's a period of time there where I was trying to find my one and through the act of dating and everything else, like I went a full seven months without ejaculation. Quit masturbation, quit the rest of it. I don't know too many other people that are like yeah, been close to a year, I have not ejaculated. That's no masturbation, that's no sex, that's no falling or playing around did not ejaculate. So I think that was, um, like a lot of people were like holy shit, how the hell did you do that? Because, as especially I coach men, we know how challenging it is even to go two weeks without ejaculation, right? So my gym routine flawless, always has been.

Speaker 1: 4:21

I compete professionally in bodybuilding competitions, so my dedication. And I compete professionally in bodybuilding competitions, so my dedication. And when I compete in bodybuilding competitions. I've done it healthily. I was the most productive I've ever been in my entire life and I felt the most. My mood and attitude was my highest when I was competing. My dedication to learning and communicating never failed. So I keep keep on learning and getting better at communicating and conversation techniques.

Speaker 1: 4:43

My creativity always at an all-time high, consistently creating my boundaries and standards in relationships was at an all-time high, which enabled me to process my emotions, especially going through breakups. I could still show up at work. I could still crush this thing. I could you know like I had all these skills and attributes and qualities, especially in regards to relationships where people are like, wow, how do you know this and how do you know this, how can you predict this thing and how can you communicate this without getting scared? So that is something that people who I was coaching desire. They're like, oh, I want that. I want those standards, right, I want to be able to have those things and this is just like the foundations, right. This is before leadership and before business, business and everything else.

Speaker 1: 5:22

But that wasn't me. I used to be the guy who said yes to everything and everyone. I would stay up late watching anime for two like three in the clock in the morning. I was addicted to porn and validation from women. I always tried to impress my friends and ended up drinking when I was going out. I always tried. I was always tired. I was so tired all the time and I used to eat like shit to try to gain my energy, like I just tried to be. Oh, more food's going to be the answer, because you know, I'm trying to get jacked. That was like my excuse. I couldn't post what I wanted to on social media. I was scared as hell. I couldn't do any sales techniques or any sales tasks.

Speaker 1: 5:51

I'm like, oh, anything to like make money or start my own business was such like a forceful experience of like you have to do this and being able to spend my own money on business was like I could not spend my like spending $250 to build a website to give people free information. When I first did that, I was like what the hell am I doing? And I spent all my money on trying to give back to everyone as best as possible. Um would, I would project on my team whenever I would make a mistake in business and I would blame them. Right, I would blame them and I would always be trying to control everything and manipulate things to go the way I wanted to, instead of letting people use and develop their own unique expressions. So all of this was happening Yuck, gross, right. So what I'm going to teach you below is essentially after this is what I've learned that was able to completely transform my standards One, there's a concept and a philosophy to learn, and then there's an area where you can analyze your own standards.

Speaker 1: 6:48

So I want you to know where I come from and the consequences of everything. So let's get straight into it, because this like blew my brain and it was studying philosophy. Philosophy really helped me set my standards high, and I believe that setting your own personal standards be able to have boundaries in boundaries and the discipline to adhere to them and the confidence to back them up is the key to achieving your goals and the success that you want, really understanding that you're on the right path. You always have been on the right path and you always will be on the right path. And if you're listening to this and you're learning this now and you're like man, I do have higher standards and there is more in the tank, good, I want you to understand that, because now you can make a move to start achieving it. So this is what I learned, right, the philosopher that I like my favorite philosopher is Friedrich Nietzsche, and he essentially hated mediocrity and he hated conformity, so conforming to the opinions of society, or whatever it is, hated it.

Speaker 1: 7:40

He encouraged people to rise above average standards and pursue excellence, so he had this theory of basically talking about humans should try to become the overmensch, which is man who has overcome himself is essentially a lot of his theory, and he was an advocate for rejecting societal norms and establishing your own higher standards. He made a lot of criticism on christianity and he believed in christianity, but what he didn't like was the culture of Christianity and he felt like there were so many people out there that would get obsessed with the culture and that would give they would give away all of their individuality to be part of a group of people who basically would shun anyone else out who wasn't a Christian, and his arguments were he didn't like the culture and he loved the religion and if people put their own individuality first and mesh that in with Christianity, then they would be able to set themselves free. Very interesting, right? It's very interesting and like sensitive topic for people who are Christians in there. But, like his father was a pastor, and I just believe how his way of using the process of individuation to become yourself is so powerful.

Speaker 1: 8:51

So listen some of these quotes right the will to power can manifest itself only against resistances. Therefore, it seeks that which resists it. The will to power is essentially meaning your own motivation to achieve success in the modern world, your own motivation to get what you want and have your goals right. It manifests itself only against resistances. So you achieving your goals will come only when it experiences resistances. Therefore, it seeks that which resists it. This means it everything that you're struggling against, every standard that you're trying to set.

Speaker 1: 9:28

Every time you have a setback or something's not working the way that you want, it is the exact thing to overcome. That is what you have manifested to learn the skill to get better at so that you can earn the power and get the success so you can achieve your goals. And when you start to saturate every single challenge that you have with gratitude, you're on the right path. Boom, boom, how amazing right. You're on the right path. Boom, boom, how amazing right.

Speaker 1: 9:52

Man is something that shall be overcome. What have you done to overcome him. So this is basically, if you put this to yourself and this is from the book thus spoke darasush dara zarathustra is it's like you're supposed to be overcoming yourself, which means you're always supposed to be setting higher standards, adhering to your standards and consistently growing so that you can become the best version of yourself, right? So what have you done to overcome him? Meaning, what standards are you setting and which ones are you adhering to and which ones are you not? Because if you're not adhering to your standards, you're not setting higher standards, you're not getting there. Then you're not trying to overcome yourself. And if you're not trying to overcome yourself, it's like, what are you doing? Essentially, it's like then you're conforming to the needs of society and you're not believing in yourself and you're indulging in mediocrity. Right? That's essentially what he's saying, right? Pretty mind-blowing looking at this stuff. Hold on, this is just making a bit of noise up on here.

Speaker 1: 10:45

Next quote the individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe or the herd. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened, but no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself. Oh, I'll repeat that again, it's so powerful. The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often and sometimes frightened, but no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself. Essentially, what he's saying is here is that having your own standards and trying to adhere to them is you're going to get met with judgment. Other people are going to question your standards and think that you should have different standards and think that you should be doing something right. And people will say that. And if you adhere to your standards and you stick to them, you're going to be met with loneliness and fear. Right, and that is part of your hero's journey to overcome.

Speaker 1: 11:40

Because if you're setting those standards and you're setting high standards in the people around you, then you're distancing yourself, you're separating yourself from the tribe. You're separating yourself from the herd because you're not like them. You're setting different standards and then they have to now face their own pain, their own truth and overcome their own shit in order to evolve, to keep up with you, or they'll drag you back down Tool poppy syndrome. This means you're going to feel isolated and this means you're going to get scared sometimes Whole shit, which is why people are afraid to post on social media. Start their own personal brand, start a new business. Or I don't want to start a new business because, like, my family might judge me or what are my friends going to think? I won't be able to be friends with my friends anymore. I won't be able to connect with my family anymore. What's everyone on social media going to think? If I try to start my own business, right, that's just going to prevent you from becoming the best version of yourself. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself. When you set high standards and you start achieving what he's saying, it is the best thing that you can do, and you would throw all of your money and everything in the bin to have the privilege of being 100%. You Amazing, right?

Speaker 1: 12:37

Eric Neumann is a psychologist. He believed that setting standards is essential for the ego's development and the progression of your own consciousness. So essentially, as you're growing your ego, the more you're adhering to your standards gives you the ability to be able to become more conscious, develop your own ego. High standards help individuals navigate the complexities of their inner and outer worlds. So obviously you're going to have internal conflicts around achieving standards, and then your outer world is going to reflect the standards that you actually do. Quote true growth occurs when we embrace the shadow and integrate it into our conscious awareness, meaning that when we want to set new standards, we're going to learn shit about ourselves that we don't want to learn. And when we face it and overcome it, bam. That's how we get to the next level. Stoicism teaches this.

Speaker 1: 13:21

Stoicism for standards is doing all that one must do in a day. That's stoicism. Right, so powerful, so simple. It's like what do you have standards? What are your standards? Doing all that one must do in a day? That's selfism. Right, so powerful, so simple. What do you have standards? What are your standards for yourself? As a psoic, I just do everything I need to do in a day. It's beautiful. So what is high standards? I believe it's simply what you commit to. I'm going to list, like in a second list, out some areas and I want you guys to think and rate yourself on these areas from like one to five. Where are you at in regards to your standards? And you can take notes on this if you like, but if you work on these skills and standards, you will improve and get closer to your goals.

Speaker 1: 13:54

The problem is most people face they don't. The problem most people face is they don't know exactly what they should be doing and they just aren't doing it why? Right, because they lack one standard. Right, there's one standard to rule them all and it's to work on yourself. Working on yourself is a standard you must keep. This is why set the standard. My program community. The only commitment we make for the guys to do is to come to one of our coaching calls every week. Right, because when they only commit to that, it's less overwhelming and the rest falls into line. They start doing the networking, they start completing the course modules, they start taking action in the real world and seeing things come to life. If they can do it, you can do it too. Here are the areas for standards. Please score yourself a one to five. Or just think them Health and fitness, your exercise how well are you exercising to your highest capable of standards? Your routine, your sleep, how you eat and your hydration. Just recently, think of, like the last week. Score all those areas one to five.

Speaker 1: 14:52

Self-growth standards, commitment to continuous learning. You're clear and have articulated goals. You have a deep sense of meaning and purpose. You have emotional development and you're committed to that. You're committed to intellectual development. You're committed to productivity and discipline and you're committed to a growth mindset one to five relationship. You're committed to communication and learning communication skills. You're committed to productivity and discipline and you're committed to a growth mindset one to five relationship. You're committed to communication and learning communication skills. You're committed to learning how to have conversations. You're committed to intimacy, committed to boundaries and learning about boundaries and implementing boundaries, and committed to learning more about love and celebration and adhering to that standards.

Speaker 1: 15:27

Committing to making sales in any area. Committed to wealth, education and learning consistently committed to mentorship, learning about yourself and other areas of business. Committed to networking. Committed to budgeting and investing. Committed to your own leadership and leadership development and committed to your own personal branding. These are the basic areas. So now you've listened to these and you've gone through and you've think to yourself, one to five okay, where am I at in all of these areas?

Speaker 1: 15:54

Now you've got some moves to make the weakest ones. You want to raise the standards just by one. Your highest ones you just want to raise your standards just by one, because what happens is the highest standards that you have, it's harder to set. You know it set. You know it takes more time and energy to make your standard just a little bit higher. Right, it's a little bit higher. So if you're already waking up at five o'clock in the morning and you want to get up early, it's like, okay, I want to get up at 450, right, but if you're waking up at seven it's going to be a little bit easier to go. All, right, I'm gonna go straight to six. Right, there's a bigger gap in in the standards.

Speaker 1: 16:21

So find the ones that you're weak, make the bigger shifts, because that feels the best, and you go oh, I've got some motivation. And then for your higher standards, like, what's the tiny little thing that you can do to make it? You know, let's say, if you're like a 4.2, like how can I get to a 4.3 today? And that's essentially it. Now you've read all these, it's time for you to go and implement. And if you need a hand with any of this, send me a DM and get straight into it and I be excellent. So follow along, make sure you follow the podcast, share this podcast with one friend thank you so much for listening. And if you want more help and want to raise your standards professionally, come and join. Set the standard. It's the best place to be for men to get growth. See everyone, thank you.